How to Teach your Children about Profanity.

What words are in YOUR rubbish bin?

My little sister has noticed that I’m swearing alot on my blog. The BEEP BEEP words have been steadily increasing and she’s a little concerned…I didnt know this, so i went right away and did a quick scan. Ouch. She’s right. A lot more nasty language has been creeping its way into my blog. This realization, prompted me to run this post. Again. Because clearly, I need the reminder.

Once a week we’re supposed to have a family meeting. Its called ‘Family Home Evening’. There’s a short lesson usually from the scriptures,a report from everyone on what they did that week, and then everyones favourite – games and refreshments.

The other night, JB gave the lesson. It was about bad language. Rubbish bin words. He had a basket of assorted words, good and bad and we had to say if they belonged in the bin. The lesson had scriptures from the Bible to go with it. The thing is…he had ME read all the scriptures that talk about bad language. He had ME look at all the bad words and there was much eyebrow raising and shoulder nudging from him and the rest of family as I had to say they belonged in the rubbish…apparently, the mother of this family is the ONLY one who uses the majority of the rubbish words.

JB : “Whats that word mum?”
Mother : “ummm…the dammit word”
JB: “Thats right, thats the word that the Beast uses because she heard SOMEBODY in this room saying it….any idea who taught her that word?” hint hint nudge nudge. “What’s this word mum?”
Mother: “Ummm I think its the s*hit word”
JB: “We can’t hear you mum – do you mean the s word that the Beast yelled out this afternoon because she hears her mother say it? THAT word?”

And so the excruciating lesson continued…it ended with suggestions of words one could use INSTEAD of the rubbish bin ones. Words like ‘flowers…rats….be silent instead of shut up…i love you instead of you idiot….’ I nodded my head contritely. I promised that I would say ‘FLOWERS’ next time Satan tried to take over my vocab.

I the mother of this family, had been chastened. I had been on the receiving end of one of those ‘lessons with a secret but pointed message prepared specifically for a child/person who needs them‘. The lesson was over. I went outside to feed the dogs.One hungry mongrel jumped up overeagerly and scratched me with his claws. I yelled to all the neighborhood…

SHIT – you damn dog!”

Heavy pause. “I mean, oh flowers, flowers, flowers!”

So readers, have YOU ever been on the receiving end of advice or a reprimand from YOUR children? Do you have trouble with keeping ‘rubbish bin words’ out of your vocab?

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7 comments

  1. I unfortunately have a mouth of a sailor but I'm very careful around my son. He apparently has picked it up from school. smh It's tough to keep them from hearing it because they always end up hearing it on the radio, tv, movies or in public. We don't give a reaction when someone says it around him because that emphasizes that it's bad. So we ignore it but I always pull the person over to tell them to be careful around kids. @lyfeslyrics

  2. Once I asked my son in Samenglish to put some grocery shopping on the 'faka' (you know, the bench, countertop) and was rewarded with "Oh, Mum you said the 'F' word!". A quick vocabulary lesson in Samoan followed about what a 'faka' was. Need to invest in some post it notes I think lol

  3. I agree with anon. It's so hard to protect kids from the bad words these days. Especially if we're guilty of saying them ourselves. I mist admit I am pretty bad. Sometimes the boys at work even remind me I'm being a bit of a potty mouth. My parents never swore. I think I picked it all up at school, from TV and *gasp* in the books I read!

  4. In this entry, my mum must be you and I must be JB! Lol.Whether my mum dislikes something/ doesn't care about it/ is neutral, she ALWAYS says the same thing: "i HATE [insert thing that she only mildly dislikes or finds slightly annoying]"I can't stand to hear the woman who is so vibrant, loving, selfless, strong, open minded, independent, hard working, and intelligent say such a heated thing – it doesn't suit her.

  5. Mother of Plumeria says….OH MY FLOWERS FLOWERS FLOWERS….I cant believe you just told the world about your mothers disgusting mouth hahahaha…but seriously? Yes you are right – I grew up hearing "I hate" and it was instilled in me from a very young age and ever since my daughter learned how to 'advocate' she has said "Mum dont say hate"…and I just keep on doing it……..I will try flowers from now on, instead of the "F" word or the "S" word, and I will say "GOSH IM NOT REALLY SURE ABOUT…." instead of "I hate"…

  6. Im still trying very hard to be better when it comes to profanity. But you know, saying 'flowers' just isnt as satisfying as some of the other darker options, sigh. thanks for the encouraging comments ladies.Plumeria and Plumeria's mum, I love that you both can communicate so openly on here – what a great example of good mother daughter communication, love it! Lani Wendt Young

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