Bad Mothers Run Away

I’m leaving…on a jet plane. Dont know when I’ll be back again. Baby, I can’t stay…

Sometimes I want to run away from my children. Especially after a week like this one when sick children haven’t been able to go to school and I’ve been stuck with them all day. All night. No, they’re not sick enough to go to the hospital. Not sick enough to knock on deaths door. Not sick enough to lie in bed and sleep all day. No. They are just sick enough that any mother with a few drops of the milk of human kindness in them – would not feel right booting them out the door.(and yes, I totally meant to slip in that sly reference to Lady Macbeth, the most bad-ass mutha of all time.)

Instead half-sick children stay at home and they want to read stories with me, squabble over the cartoon channels, fight about who got the highest score on Xbox Kinnect, turn their rooms upside down, snack constantly and generally use up all the air with my name on it. Yes, when they stay home I am slowly but surely driven to desperation and I think about buying a one-way ticket to Hullabaloo. Never heard of it? Neither have I. Which means my kids won’t ever find me there.

So when every child was finally healthy enough to go to school again? I rejoiced. I happily prepared lunches and searched for errant uniforms. I was even singing. ‘Oh happy day!

And then the Princess stopped me mid-song. “Poor mum. You must be so lonely when we all go to school. I’m sorry we’re all leaving you at home. You must miss us so much.”

Umm. Yes totally. Miserable. Gutted. Wracked with despair.

NOT.

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10 comments

  1. How I feel the same way! I wish there was a resort just for moms to get away from it all!!! wishful thinking?! If I feel this way now when my girls are toddlers, I can only imagine when they are teenagers! acckkkk!

  2. Hehe!!!That's hilarious!!! I don't have kids yet. (Still trying.) I am still at the point where I can give my niece and nephew back.But, tell me more about Hullabaloo. Palm trees and white sandy beaches? Swim up bars, nightly shows, Karaoke?;)I need to get away… Take me with you.

  3. It's tough being a mother and especially when your child is sick!! But you ladies should go on mothers retreat they do have you know! Or even just a little get away with your girls!! Everyone also ask why I take so long on the shower well it's the only ME time I get hahaha not even my precious bed is mine anymore

  4. Anon – I know thats you Pele! And the answer has nothing to do with badgers dammnit. It could have alot to do with a wonderful exciting aunty in Australia wanting to have all her nieces and nephews over for a holiday! ( narwhals my a**….)Thank you ladies for the encouragement and commiseration. I defn think a resort for tired child caregivers would be perfect. And yes, it MUST have cocktails, palm trees, swim up bars, and lots of half naked waiters who all look like Conan. Or Green Lanter. (Im not fussy)Until then, I will be taking long showers with earphones on trying to pretend that Im alone and there arent five kids banging on the door.

  5. I totally feel you, Lani. I've been a SAHM for almost 4 years now. Next week my son starts preschool. Hallelujah!I don't think anyone realizes how draining being a SAHM is unless they're doing it when they'd rather not be. Some parents love spending every waking moment with their child. Though I've raised a proper mama's boy, I definitely enjoy my breaks and wouldn't mind visiting Hullabaloo myself. :)5 days a week, full days… I am SO thankful for preschool. Now to figure out what to do with that extra time.

  6. Alongside the guilt I carry for being a 'working mum' (what a stupid thing to say – ever heared of a mum who doesn't work?!?) and away from home 50 hours a week … is the everlasting thankfulness that I'm away from home 50 hours a week … I hear ya.

  7. It does seem like a catch-22, Spanna. We're supposed to be grateful for every moment with our children. Last night, my pastor said, "Enjoy it while you can." Only a few hours before I cuddle next to my husband in the pew and whispered, "I want to get married again and have a honeymoon. Just you and me. Wouldn't it be nice to send the kids off and come home to no children then prepare for a vacation?"I love my kids and want to keep them for the long haul, but I still want a break from them… a looooong break.I look forward to my oldest going off to the military this year… starting her own life as an adult outside my house. I love when my kids spend vacations with their grandparents… especially when they're all gone at once.If not for society telling me I should feel bad about wanting some time to myself, I'd embrace breaks completely. Heck… I embrace them anyway while secretly thinking society doesn't have a clue.

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