When it’s time to get ready to go out. Anywhere where looking nice is required. Dinner. Church. Mall. Movies. Book function.
Now? I hate getting dressed up to go out. I can’t find my brush because Bella took it to style Dora doll’s hair. Sade nicked my tweezers and forgot where she put them. My favorite lipstick is a suspicious splodgy mess because somebody ‘borrowed’ it the last time they were playing dress-up…Big Son is hogging the bathroom and I don’t have time to luxuriate in a hot shower. Little Son keeps coming into my room while I’m trying to re-arrange my hair 3 different ways to ask ‘have you seen Bella’s scooter?’ (Why in heck would I have a child’s scooter in my bedroom I ask?) And the Hot Man is blinded by the eyes of love (and by the eyes of impatience because he’s sick to bits of waiting for me to get ready.) So he sits there and makes the most irritating comments of all – ‘Why are you changing your dress again? What was wrong with the other one? You’re going to straighten your hair now? You do realize that we have ten minutes to make it to church on time, don’t you? Do you have to put on makeup? You look fine without it. Now what are you doing?!’ Hello, does he want me to be an ugly, sloppy bag of a wife?!
And what makes it worse? When finally, I’m dressed, we all exit the building to get in the car and then I notice what my children look like. The two teenagers look svelte and refined. And clearly their svelteness prevented them from supervising the wardobe choices of the younger three. Bella has two different socks and shoes on. ‘We couldn’t find her matching ones and besides, she likes this style much better.’. Nobody has brushed her hair and I’m sure that’s a glob of bubblegum stuck in it. Little Son has squeezed himself into his favorite jeans – the ones that he can’t zip up all the way and I don’t want to look too closely because as usual, he has ‘forgotten’ to put any underwear on. Surprise. The Princess is looking stunning – in a bewildering array of colors…sequin belt, huge red flower on her head, pink ruffled skirt, orange top, a necklace made of xmas decorations. She is a Cyndi Lauper vision from the eighties
I look at this motley crew of fabulousness in all their glory.
And then I just want to stay home.
Girls. We just want to have fun. And get dressed without a pack of pestering children interrupting us.